A few weeks ago, I went to our 25 acre farm in WV. My plans were to have a heathful time of eating veggies, Bible reading, and prayer to finish my healing process from the cancer. There I was enjoying nature and the beauty of the WV hills as well as my times of listening to Bible tapes and the good healthy food.
Much to my surprise, I noticed a lump under my arm and then in my breast, both near the original cancer site. I waited until my husband came for the weekend so he could confirm it, which he did.
From my reading, I understand that the medical community does not offer hope once the cancer has metastasized beyond the breast. They will do surgery, chemo, etc but not as a cure.
Because of what I felt was God's leading (the events that I spoke of in my last blog), I felt definitively that I did not want further destruction to my body. I want to build my immune system and let my body fight off the invader.
I shared this desire for no further treatment with my family members and close friends, telling them that I felt it was a waste to see the doctor as I felt the lumps had to be cancer because of their proximity to the first site. My family had varied reactions but almost universal was their desire for me to see the doctor.
Because of this I went to see the doctor this week instead of in June when it was scheduled. After an exam, a mammogram, and an ultrasound, it was determined that I have fluid filled cysts and nothing of concern.
Needless to say, I am thanking God. The huge specter of active cancer is no longer looming over me.
In the midst of all of this, I received the DVD's that I ordered as a result of the events in my last blog. They are by Dr Lorraine Day. In them she purports radical nutritional changes, including no meat, and a diet of only veggies and fruit and fresh juice plus limited whole grains and almonds. She allows no sweeteners of any kind and no processed foods. This seemed not unreasonable to me at all when I was staring death in the face. Actually it still seems reasonable to me.
I have been juicing (with my husband) 10 pounds of organic carrots a day. I am turning a little orange. In truth, I love this diet. I am never hungry and the food is so satisfying. The sugar cravings are much better-- although I admit meat and coffee still smell great. Dr Day also proposes a very low fat diet in terms of eating minimal olive oil and only a few almonds. She has many other specifics and reasons for each instruction.
Dr Day had stage 4 breast cancer with metastasis to the bone, muscle and lymphatics. Her tumor was grapefruit size. At one point she was literally at death's door, unable to keep down any food or fluid. She had tried the nutritional program that she encourages but it had not worked for her. She then began a full program which she calls the 10 health commandments including much time in the Bible and prayer. She goes into this in her video "You Can't Improve on God".
I also bought the workbook that goes with this. She expounds on her thelogical beliefs which are not conventional at all. I do not agree with her on her thinking but I found it interesting reading.
Her medical and nutrtional advice made great sense to me. I also agreed that healing cannot be accomplished apart from God and his Word.
So here I am turning orange and trying to change a lifetime of habits and loving it. I am trying also to establish new habits in feeding my spirit.
Because God has been with me every step of the way, I feel this is a joyful journey. I still feel that all of this is for my good and the good of my family. I am excitedly anticipating the good things that God will bring about from this adventure.
The 2 verses that have been with me are "Though He slay me, yet I will trust Him." from Job, and "If I perish, I perish" from Esther. They sound morbid but in truth they are a great comfort to me.
The knowledge that when everything else is stripped away the foundation is rock solid is hugely comforting. In spite of this, there are three things that are not comfortable. 1.)The propect of coming face to face with God brings trembling. In no way am I ready for that except that Christ will cover me and hide my shortcomings and failures. The thought of being with God paradoxically brings great joy. I know that the greatest joys in my life won't compare to being with God. 2.)The process of dying itself is such an unknown. 3.) And lastly leaving Lee behind would be like cutting out my heart. He is my heart.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Preparation for Bad News
Yesterday I went to take some genotyping info to my GP. It is a blood test that can be done to determine if your liver has the enzymes to metabolize a specific medication. (Genotyping can be done for other things too, but this is my application.) I want to know if the Tamoxifen I am taking to inhibit estrogen will do me any good.
While I was there, I got a copy of the reports the oncologists sent to my doctor. They were much more dire than the reports my oncologists gave me. Essentially, they said that because of the family history of cancer, the grade of cancer(3-at the aggressive end of the scale), the estrogen negativity, and the opposite side site of atypical hyperplasia, I am at significant risk of recurrence. If recurrence happens anywhere but the same site, they basically consider it to be terminal cancer.
If I had this report 2 days earlier, I would have been devastated. However, because of God's intervention on Tues (see my last blog), I still feel hopeful.
Before Tuesday, I had an underlying feeling that the cancer would come back and kill me. I cannot say for sure that it still won't happen, but now I feel overwhelmingly optimistic.
The physical tip and the spiritual tip coincide today. God is in charge of your adventure. Take it a day at a time and trust that He has a customized plan for you.
While I was there, I got a copy of the reports the oncologists sent to my doctor. They were much more dire than the reports my oncologists gave me. Essentially, they said that because of the family history of cancer, the grade of cancer(3-at the aggressive end of the scale), the estrogen negativity, and the opposite side site of atypical hyperplasia, I am at significant risk of recurrence. If recurrence happens anywhere but the same site, they basically consider it to be terminal cancer.
If I had this report 2 days earlier, I would have been devastated. However, because of God's intervention on Tues (see my last blog), I still feel hopeful.
Before Tuesday, I had an underlying feeling that the cancer would come back and kill me. I cannot say for sure that it still won't happen, but now I feel overwhelmingly optimistic.
The physical tip and the spiritual tip coincide today. God is in charge of your adventure. Take it a day at a time and trust that He has a customized plan for you.
Divine appointments
I had an appt, I thought, at the church on Tues. It turned out I had mixed things up.
Happily, and I think providentially, I ran into a man there. I told him about my breast cancer and the healing retreat I have planned for a month at our farm vacation home. He told me of a woman, Judi, who had breast cancer and used nutrition as well as scripture and prayer to let God heal her without surgery, chemo or radiation.
I gave her a call and was told of her story and what she did as well as a resource to use.
She told me of Dr Lorraine Day and her books and tapes at drday.com. I have ordered them, but from what Judi told me I know I am on the right track.
As a bonus, it was worked out so that I was able to keep my appt at the church and the elder I spoke to gave me more resources--2 area oncologists who have nutritional counseling as part of their practices.
I felt so encouraged because not only do I feel like I am getting the info I need, but also, it showed me how compassionate God is to arrange these happy God incidents like hooking up with Judi and getting the names of doctors who can help in this nutritional journey.
This seems like it is all on the spiritual side today but it is not. God is concerned about every detail in our lives and I believe he arranges what we need for body, soul and spirit. We just need to remember to ask. Also we need to remember, he may not answer in the way we prescribe.
Happily, and I think providentially, I ran into a man there. I told him about my breast cancer and the healing retreat I have planned for a month at our farm vacation home. He told me of a woman, Judi, who had breast cancer and used nutrition as well as scripture and prayer to let God heal her without surgery, chemo or radiation.
I gave her a call and was told of her story and what she did as well as a resource to use.
She told me of Dr Lorraine Day and her books and tapes at drday.com. I have ordered them, but from what Judi told me I know I am on the right track.
As a bonus, it was worked out so that I was able to keep my appt at the church and the elder I spoke to gave me more resources--2 area oncologists who have nutritional counseling as part of their practices.
I felt so encouraged because not only do I feel like I am getting the info I need, but also, it showed me how compassionate God is to arrange these happy God incidents like hooking up with Judi and getting the names of doctors who can help in this nutritional journey.
This seems like it is all on the spiritual side today but it is not. God is concerned about every detail in our lives and I believe he arranges what we need for body, soul and spirit. We just need to remember to ask. Also we need to remember, he may not answer in the way we prescribe.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Changing your internal environment
Realize that if you have or had cancer that you need to make changes. It is not enough to get surgery, chemo, radiation, etc. Current thinking is that you have cancer cells in your body regularly or at least periodically. Your body fights them off and no big deal. If, however, you developed cancer, whatever in your internal environment that allowed the cancer to grow needs to be restructured.
I have already talked about many physical ways to change. Realize that what you think and what you do spiritually may be even more important. Harboring bitterness, unforgiveness, or judgments of others especially of your parents leaves you wide open for disease. Dis ease means you are no longer at ease with yourself. You need to ask why.
So many diseases of the body, mind or spirit start with not forgiving. Withholding forgiveness is like sticking a knife in yourself to hurt someone else.
Forgiving is not just a decision you make, it is a miracle which you start in the moment you make the choice to forgive and it is finished in you by the work of God. Forgiveness is always supernatural. It is not easy or cerebral. It involves constant turning the matter to God. The Bible says "Vengeance is mine, says the Lord." When we hold the slightest grudge, it makes our environment unhealthy, inside and out. The best book on this that I have ever seen is "Choosing Forgiveness" by John and Paula Sandford and Lee Bowen. It is available under resources in elijahhouse.org.
Most big hurts come to us from those really close to us. The biggest would be in our formative years especially involving our parents. It is not easy to see the places we have made judgments of our mom and dad, but it is crucial. The process must involve asking God to help and eventually coming to the point of forgiving the other person, yourself and any blame you put on God for letting the hurt happen to you.
It is best to enlist a trusted friend to listen to your confession as you speak forgiveness and ask forgiveness for any judgments you made rightly or wrongly. It is
not your job to judge anyone. When you do you will be judged also . It is a principle.
Start today making your environment more healthy. Choose forgiveness constantly for big and little things and look back to see where you have not done this in the past. Go through the process for every remembered hurt and then pray forgiveness for every unremembered hurt. It is hugely healing.
I promise this will be worthwhile though not easy.
I have already talked about many physical ways to change. Realize that what you think and what you do spiritually may be even more important. Harboring bitterness, unforgiveness, or judgments of others especially of your parents leaves you wide open for disease. Dis ease means you are no longer at ease with yourself. You need to ask why.
So many diseases of the body, mind or spirit start with not forgiving. Withholding forgiveness is like sticking a knife in yourself to hurt someone else.
Forgiving is not just a decision you make, it is a miracle which you start in the moment you make the choice to forgive and it is finished in you by the work of God. Forgiveness is always supernatural. It is not easy or cerebral. It involves constant turning the matter to God. The Bible says "Vengeance is mine, says the Lord." When we hold the slightest grudge, it makes our environment unhealthy, inside and out. The best book on this that I have ever seen is "Choosing Forgiveness" by John and Paula Sandford and Lee Bowen. It is available under resources in elijahhouse.org.
Most big hurts come to us from those really close to us. The biggest would be in our formative years especially involving our parents. It is not easy to see the places we have made judgments of our mom and dad, but it is crucial. The process must involve asking God to help and eventually coming to the point of forgiving the other person, yourself and any blame you put on God for letting the hurt happen to you.
It is best to enlist a trusted friend to listen to your confession as you speak forgiveness and ask forgiveness for any judgments you made rightly or wrongly. It is
not your job to judge anyone. When you do you will be judged also . It is a principle.
Start today making your environment more healthy. Choose forgiveness constantly for big and little things and look back to see where you have not done this in the past. Go through the process for every remembered hurt and then pray forgiveness for every unremembered hurt. It is hugely healing.
I promise this will be worthwhile though not easy.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Progress in Supplement Search
I have made some progress on the supplement search. USP, which is for the United States Pharmacopoeia, is an independent certification agency which verifies potency and purity of nutritional supplements. I still have found no natural and organic products which are also USP certified.
These products are USP certified:
Nature Made, Nature's Resource, Kirkland, Equaline, Berkley and Jensen, Nutriplus, Q-Gel, Sun Mark, Tru Nature, Your Life, and at least some product from Puritan's Pride.
If a product is USP certified it will have a USP seal on it.
In 1994, for some strange reason, a new law was passed and supplements were no longer checked for potency or purity. Therefore, we are taking pills that could contain anything or any dose. They also stopped having companies prove their claims, instead proof was on the FDA to prove a supplement was harmful.
How do we protect ourselves? One way would be to take no supplements. In my view this is harmful choice. Another way is to speak with your pocketbook and buy USP supplements. Please email me if you know of a company which is USP certified plus natural and organic , but only if you won't gain from passing on the info.
The spiritual counterpart is to be equally guarded in what we let enter our mind and spirits. Phil 4:8 Always think about what is pure. Think about what is noble, right and pure. Think about what is lovely and worthy of respect. If anything is excellent and worthy of praise, think about those kind of things.
These products are USP certified:
Nature Made, Nature's Resource, Kirkland, Equaline, Berkley and Jensen, Nutriplus, Q-Gel, Sun Mark, Tru Nature, Your Life, and at least some product from Puritan's Pride.
If a product is USP certified it will have a USP seal on it.
In 1994, for some strange reason, a new law was passed and supplements were no longer checked for potency or purity. Therefore, we are taking pills that could contain anything or any dose. They also stopped having companies prove their claims, instead proof was on the FDA to prove a supplement was harmful.
How do we protect ourselves? One way would be to take no supplements. In my view this is harmful choice. Another way is to speak with your pocketbook and buy USP supplements. Please email me if you know of a company which is USP certified plus natural and organic , but only if you won't gain from passing on the info.
The spiritual counterpart is to be equally guarded in what we let enter our mind and spirits. Phil 4:8 Always think about what is pure. Think about what is noble, right and pure. Think about what is lovely and worthy of respect. If anything is excellent and worthy of praise, think about those kind of things.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Composite of Supplement Recommendations
From "Beating Cancer with Nutrition", "Antioxidants Against Cancer", The Complete Cancer Cleanse", and from the recommendations of a nutritionist, I have composite of basic recommended supplements. Take carotenoids, C, and E together. Zinc alone.
Natural mixed carotenoids 10,000-25,000 IU
Calcium 1,200-1,500mg
CLA 1-3 grams
Folic acid 400 mcg
Green tea 3 cups per day
Lycopene 15 mg twice a day
Selenium 200-400 mcg
Vit C 500-1000mg
Natural Vit E (d forms not dl) 200-800mg of d alpha tocopherol with mixed tocopherols
Vit A 10-20,000IU (higher doses must be monitored by blood tests
Coenzyme Q10 30-300mg
Lipoic acid 50-200 mg
Zinc 15- 30 mg
Melatonin at bedtime 3-20mg (The upper levels of doses should be under medical supervision as this is a hormone. Don't take with blood cancers.
Natural mixed carotenoids 10,000-25,000 IU
Calcium 1,200-1,500mg
CLA 1-3 grams
Folic acid 400 mcg
Green tea 3 cups per day
Lycopene 15 mg twice a day
Selenium 200-400 mcg
Vit C 500-1000mg
Natural Vit E (d forms not dl) 200-800mg of d alpha tocopherol with mixed tocopherols
Vit A 10-20,000IU (higher doses must be monitored by blood tests
Coenzyme Q10 30-300mg
Lipoic acid 50-200 mg
Zinc 15- 30 mg
Melatonin at bedtime 3-20mg (The upper levels of doses should be under medical supervision as this is a hormone. Don't take with blood cancers.
Solitary Journey
We are so communal or tied together with others. We find comfort in that and are so used to journeying together. I think when you are faced with a possible terminal illness, no matter how your support system helps you, you feel alone.
This is not necessarily bad. A gift of being told you have cancer is that you have to deal with that aloneness and with mortality. The positive outcomes to this are that you get the opportunity to reflect, repent, rejoice and possibly make restitution.
I am finding that the best way to deal with these things is straight on. Instead of avoiding or distracting myself from these uncomfortable things, I do best to charge in.
The physical part of this is to allow myself to nest and deal as much a possible just with this for a time. I have the benefit of a husband who will let me do this, doing my research and nutritional forays into new territory.
The spiritual counterpart of this is taking time for a retreat with God to connect more deeply and find the rock solid bottom that I know is there, but sometimes lose sight of.
This is not necessarily bad. A gift of being told you have cancer is that you have to deal with that aloneness and with mortality. The positive outcomes to this are that you get the opportunity to reflect, repent, rejoice and possibly make restitution.
I am finding that the best way to deal with these things is straight on. Instead of avoiding or distracting myself from these uncomfortable things, I do best to charge in.
The physical part of this is to allow myself to nest and deal as much a possible just with this for a time. I have the benefit of a husband who will let me do this, doing my research and nutritional forays into new territory.
The spiritual counterpart of this is taking time for a retreat with God to connect more deeply and find the rock solid bottom that I know is there, but sometimes lose sight of.
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